Army part deux

I stayed up until 2 am the other night watching "2 Weeks in Hell," a show about the process of trying to become a Green Beret. I have to admit that YES this show looked harder than what I went thru but at the time I thought what I was going thru was in fact HELL and the worst thing I had ever experienced but also weirdly enjoyed the whole boot camp/basic training experience. I didn't like FTU very much but once my fat, tired and useless ass was in gear...and I was officially in basic training then it was aw-ight.

My mom and sister kept all the letters I wrote home.

01 June 01 says:
the Drill Sergeants make me laugh, which of course,
gets me and all the others in trouble. When I got my Army debit card and was
having trouble activating it this one DS asked where I was from and when I
said South Bend, Indiana he said "figures." Then he asked me if I got a GED
or diploma? When I said diploma he said "what a shame." :)

Going to eat is a disaster. It's called "Chow" because you literally have to
chow down or you don't finish and you go hungry. First though, you stand in line
at "parade rest" which is hands behind your back and eyes and head foward and
just inch along and inch along and you are smack dab up against the private in
front of you. Talk about being crammed in like sheep! Anywho, when you get to
the front of the line and get your tray, you take whatever they give you. Then
you quickly (everything is done in a hurry and then you end up
waiting, stupid I know) go to the tables and the whole side has to sit down
together...like at the same time, perfectly. So it's up down up down for like 5
minutes. Then once we get it sorta right, you get like 3 minutes to woof it
down. This is where I got creative because the Army doesn't give you condiments
and fancy stuff like ketchup. You get the basics and no time to doctor your food
up anyway. So i started realizing that mixing things up so they could actually slide down your throat made the amount of food consumed that much more.
So i started eating applesauce sandwiches made with pancakes and noodle
sandwiches on toast; also, putting breadstix in cranberry juice until they are
all mushy helps to just swallow them whole ---or--- bananas in milk. It's crazy
but I still like applesauce on my pancakes sometimes:)

The absolute worst part for me so far is the boredom and lack of communication with home. Every once in awhile (i think it's been about once a week) we get to call home. There are only 4 payphones outside the barracks for like 400 privates! So, needless to say, you get about 30 seconds and that's IF someone back home answers! The first time I tried to call I got the answering machine and was SOOOO pissed and sad! But anywho, there is a DS standing right there monitoring everything that is said and will just hang up if you say something bad about the Army or DS's and just click when the 30 seconds is up...no goodbys or hey ttyl...just Click, dialtone. So that's fun.

The DS 's LOVE to "smoke" people. That's where we get in trouble and have to do physical activity/movement for however long they feel like it. Their favorite is Front, Back, Go. Front is mountain climbers with push-ups. Back is bicycle or flutter kicks. Go is run in place, high knees. The DSs like to go from one to the next really quick-like so all we end up doing is just getting up and sitting down and standing up. It's actually humorous to look around and watch everybody struggle and fall and bump into eachother. People start crying and everything!

I laugh A LOT at basic training. The DSs say some of the funniest things! They call us names like "Function" and say things like "you are ate up private." They would also wave candy and chips and chocolate in front of our faces and then eat it. I hate them. One time this girl went to the doctor and they gave her cough drops. We all begged her for one because they are kinda like candy. OMG! They are NOT candy. Everybody's tongues started going numb and one girl yelled out "I can't swallow" because she couldn't feel her throat. Then right after that the bar in her closet that was holding all her uniforms all nice and neat fell down.

17 June 01

I arrived at Basic Training in CATTLE CARS...yes, the actual trailers that take cattle from farm to farm. How embarrassing! We had to hold our huge, heavy duffle bag over our heads while we were issued our gear...so, for like EVER! Anyway, we were then seperated into platoons...4 platoons to one company. My DS is DS Brough. He's from Indiana! We were pushed into rooms and given "battle buddies." Mine is Blackwell and we are to NEVER be apart or be caught alone anywhere...I'm assuming for safety reasons...so we are together for the next 9 weeks! She seems cool though and is older like me and married. She's from Utah.

There are over 80 females and 3 shower heads! We have to strip, wash, rinse and dress in 2 minutes. Girls were fighting, screaming, pushing, falling and biting! It was hilarious! This way of showering isn't how we have to do it all the time. Yesterday we were unsupervised so I was in the cool water for over 10 minutes...oh, the things that we take for granted!! Oh and we don't get razors to shave and some princesses were bawling and begging for theirs back. Too funny.

I have a cold too. Sniffling and sneezing...doesn't go over well when we are to be in formation at attention; which is standing straight, not moving for anything and then I sneeze! So we get smoked...front, back , GO! :) They are all loving my sick ass. I was looking forward to the sunday day off but it isn't. Yeah, we get to go to church; where Blackwell makes out with her husband in the closet the whole service LOL, but after that we have to take care of the grounds...rake leaves, mow lawns, weed flower beds. THAT'S NOT A DAY OFF!! HELLO!!

PT is done every morning before the sun comes up. Every other day is a "run day" and the other days are "exercise days." We are seperated into groups according to our abilities and speed (I'm in the slowest, of course) and they will smoke us if we are not running fast enough, during a fast paced 2 mile run. Jerks. This morning we got smoked in the tall grass in our running shorts. So, I am a walking RASH of bloody cuts and scrapes. Good times. Also, the "exercise days" are a joke. It's just more time set aside to smoke us. Any chance they get to watch us suffer is enjoyment to the DSs. If you have to poop. If you want your letter from home. If you want to see the doctor...you have to earn it...which means: they smoke you until they get tired of watching you and then you can go poop or get your mail or go to sick call. I hate them sometimes.

But sometimes when others get smoked it's funny. For instance, this VERY chinese guy in my platoon didn't keep his rifle pointing AWAY from everyone so he had to run around the area, back and forth gun held overhead repeating and yelling, "I tried to shot the drill sergeant!" So incrediably hilarious! With his accent and everything! Another time this guy had to run around the formation all morning because he left his locker unlocked with all his gear inside...he had to carry his crap over his head and repeat "hey. hey. look at me. I need a home." Another time this other guy had to repeat "hey. hey. look at me. I like to jerk around in the chow line" because he couldn't stand still like the rest of us.

I have this little calendar I keep in my pocket that I am using to keep track of what we do. I will explain all that later (like what is actually learned at basic training). Well, I love you and miss you and don't like being up at 0500 and miss sleeping in. Gotta go. Formation in 3, 2, 1... Jenna